WHAT a busy week. My wife Stacy and I are both a year older. I bought her a treatment at a health spa; she got me a fire extinguisher in case the candles on my cake got out of control! On Friday I rang the Queen to advise her to officially declare Andy Murray Scottish again. I now accept that, in some sports, we're just there to make up the numbers.

Last Saturday we hit the craft fair on Cathedral Green. I spent most of my time watching the Punch and Judy show. It might be worth Punch knowing that wives spend 7,920 minutes a year nagging their husbands about household chores; that's 11 hours a month. Eighty-seven per cent of the Judys studied were not ashamed about their nagging, and admitted giving their partner a hard time to get them to do something. Surprisingly, 83 per cent of the men thought their partner was right to nag them.

That other volatile couple, Katie Price and Alex Reid, had their marriage blessed on Sunday. Remind me; why is she a celebrity? I spent Sunday night looking at the skies above Alphington. Have you seen the photos of the 'Spirograph cluster'? It's 2,000 light years away; you may need a telescope. There's still no sign of the Connect 4 nebula, though.

Closer to home, I've noticed an increase in crime. First the people upstairs were burgled, then someone nicked the aerial off my car and my bike was vandalised. I checked the crime rate for my postcode on the Devon and Cornwall website and discovered that, according to their latest figures, crime in Alphington has increased 32.1 per cent compared to the same period last year, with burglaries in the area up a whopping 131.3 per cent. I was comforted then to see PCSOs Kevin Davies and Juliet Cullen patrolling on my street earlier today. Their presence must be a deterrent to criminals. Times are hard and some are feeling desperate.

Unfortunately, people are now only half as 'neighbourly' as they were 30 years ago. A new study claims nearly half of us are more familiar with our favourite celebrity than with those living across the road. Now more than ever we need to look out for each other. Only a quarter of us say we keep an eye on elderly or disabled people living close by. Do you ?